Going to the temple

First off, I apologize that what I've written lately has been so serious and cheezy and emotional, but what can I say, emotions are running high these days :)

Anyway, I set the appointment to go through the temple on March 30, the day before the wedding. I wanted to go earlier to have more time between that and the sealing but that's when the majority of family is coming and some of them wanted to be there. So the 30th it is. But I have been really anxious to go to the temple. Including a meltdown in the distribution center when Felipe and I went to look at the dresses and garments, and breaking down crying when I start talking about it. I'm high strung, I know. But what I want to write about here is what has helped me with the panic and anxiety and over-all feeling of weirdness.

First, I force myself to take a step back and fall on my testimony. Yes, the church is true. Yes, God is a living God. Yes, the restoration was inspired. If all this is true than what happens in the temple is sacred and true as well.

Second, the people I love and trust most in the world go to the temple and are strong in the church. My grandparents are currently temple president and matron, my mother goes, and Felipe is the most logical and reasonable person I know and he loves the temple.

Third, one night when I had been struggling with the anxiety of going, I started reading my scriptures and decided to read some of my favorite ones. Even though my knowledge of the temple has changed, the gospel has not. The scriptures are the same. God is the same. The Savior is my same friend. That hasn't changed at all.

And fourth, Felipe. I know this is corny. Skip it if you want. But he has really been my biggest advocate with this decision. He still comforts me with each breakdown. He constantly reassures me that this is good and right. He told me that the reason he wasn't afraid of going to the temple for the first time was because of his mother's example. He said he would watch her go each week and see her come back so happy and that made him excited to go for himself. I'd like to thank her for that. I am also grateful for his priesthood and worthiness. He gave me a blessing for comfort two nights ago and it was a very sweet experience. He tells me all the time that he's excited for me to go, he's excited to be there with me, and that he's excited for us to continue to go after we're married.

I'm still nervous. I'm still weirded out by a lot of things. I'm still apprehensive and I still need reminders, but I know it will be good.